truths

On Instagram last week, I posted a snapshot of my Panera inspired Mediterranean bowl and I received several people messaging me, asking what it was. So being the kind-hearted person I am, I decided to blog about it. I stumbled upon this game changer when I forgot my lunch. With Panera right across the street from my office, it was an easy decision of where I would order from. I found the bowl  through Panera’s online menu and ordered through Grubhub’s app. The only reason I mention this is because, literally the next day I decided to order the bowl again for dinner, but ordered through Panera’s drive thru. Of course I had no idea what the name was of the item I literally just ordered yesterday. So as I struggled to tell the woman what I wanted, mumbling Lord only knows what, and frantically scanning the outdoor menu, I just started shouting words at this poor woman. CHICKEN! ARUGULA! HUMMUS! It was like a game of Taboo, Panera version. Finally the woman figured it out and rang me up for the Mediterranean Bowl. 

After feeling so embarrassed of the last 2 minutes of my life, I told the woman that I really did try to look for the item on the menu, but just kept coming up short. Then I randomly told her I ordered the same thing yesterday and asked if she remembered me, she obviously didn’t.  After closing the drive thru window on me mid-sentence, I was pretty certain she had deemed me mental or on drugs. When she gave me my food, she broke the ice by telling me that the bowls are only on some menus and it varies per location. Hence, why I did not see the bowls on the drive thru menu, but new about it through Panera’s website. Hence why I had to tell you that I initially ordered the bowl on the website, because if I didn’t and one of you went to order it and the woman said “um, I have no idea what you are talking about?“, you would have been mad and ripped me a new one. Well at least that’s what I would have done. 

… Any who

Back to the bowl. OK, below are the ingredients found in Panera’s bowl. I believe the bowl came to somewhere around $11 after tax when I ordered it through the drive thru. Lord only knows how much it was when I ordered it through Grubhub, probably $3.00 more plus a tip plus fees and taxes, who knows.

Mediterranean Grain Bowl with Chicken

  • Cilantro lime brown rice & quinoa
  • Chicken raised without antibiotics (are they serious? Who puts that as a listed ingredient?)
  • Arugula
  • Red grape tomatoes
  • Kalamata olives (disgusting)
  • Diced cucumbers
  • Hummus
  • Lemon Tahini dressing  (no idea what Tahini is or means #fancy)
  • Feta crumbles (so boojee) 
  • Greek yogurt with a squeeze of lemon (one squeeze. No more, no less)
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Delicious right?! If not, do me a favor and stop reading. So after spending around $25 on two of these bowls, I thought 1. that is a lot of money to be spending on “fast food” and 2. I can definitely make this myself and probably make it a little bit healthier, although finding chickens raised without antibiotics might be challenge. Because who can really guarantee me like Panera can that they are without antibiotics? Awkward.

Needless to say, I made a list of all the listed ingrediants and headed to the grocery store, where I arrived only to find the list MIA. Shocker. And so the countdown beings. Side note:  I can only last about 21 minutes in a grocery store before I start losing interest, opening the food found in my cart and in the aisle of retail goods (you know like lawn chairs and candles. Shit you would never expect to get a grocery store but when you do it’s like the biggest win of your life) while eating Skinny Pop and getting looks from old ladies. It is safe to say I hate grocery shopping and online ordering has shit the bed due to COVID-19. 

OK, back to my list. Well at this point I have lost 3 minutes trying to dissect my purse and every pocket on my body, accepting that I left the list at home. So what do we do in situations like this? I’ll give you one hint, think high school when you get called on to answer a question and you haven’t been paying attention for the last 15 minutes, you wing it. Below is my first attempt at the Panera bowl and I am sure I will modify it several more times.

AB’s Albanian Bowl (get it? I am from Albany? Stupid. I know)

  • Grilled, free range, organic and sprinkled in gold chicken tenders (whachu know about that Panera?!)
  • Organic Arugula (with a  portion of the sales goes towards Olivia’s Organics Children’s Foundation. Nope Panera doesn’t offer that) 
  • Risotto rice (I accidently grabbed the wrong container of Rice Select, but had I grabbed the correct one, I would have chosen Texmatic Brown Basmati Rice)
  • Hummus (I went super basic and got Sabre Original. Next time will definitely get garlic hummus)
  • Tzatziki sauce (way off Lloyd. No where in the actual Panera bowl was tzatziki sauce. I actually have no idea where this came from)
  • Cucumber
  • Feta crumbles
  • Quinoa (I got a premade one. We were nearing the 21 minute deadline and no one wanted me lounging in the lawn chairs of Hannaford while eating Lucky Charms. It is a bad look for everyone)

I will have several more renditions of Panera’s bowl to follow, because even after writing this post, I will forget what I am supposed to buy. Plus, I messed up this week’s so bad that it can only go up from here. However, the tzatziki sauce was pretty legit. I will keep you posted. Enjoy xo

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