move on

When it comes to being there for a friend during a break up, I realized that I don’t know if I can. And it’s not that I don’t want to be there, well… after the 5th call of tears, muttered sentences and awkward silence… maybe I don’t, but I think I just suck at handling other people’s break ups.

Now some people are amazing at being comfort blankets for their friends and being super supportive, encouraging and positive. Yeah… not me. If you haven’t figured out from my blog, I am a straight shooter. I am the one who will listen to everything you say during our first phone call and also be the one who will mutter the four little words… “It’s Over, Move On.” I don’t handle pity parties well and to be honest, I really do not want to be invited. Break ups should be between two people: your partner and you. We should not be blasting posts on Facebook with hidden, but not really, messages. Or posting lyrics from Justin Bieber songs or Coldplay about loosing someone. Save it sister, because the moment I see that shit, its unfriend, unfollow, and goodbye.

I don’t handle it well and I am starting to think it makes me a bad person. Does it? Like I said before, a break up is between two people and the moment you get your girlfriends involved, trouble starts. They can say the wrong thing or the right thing that turns out to be the wrong thing… 10 days down the road, after ya’ll are back together.  Great. We speak the truth, but it hurts, then it stings and burns and next thing you know you are friendless. Girls are messed up. End of story and I think that is why I cannot handle break ups. I still feel like a bad friend not being able to be there, but during all of my break ups, I have always wanted to be alone. I want to feel my emotions and I want to deal with them on my own. I do not want my friends to tell me how to deal with them, that’s not what I have friends for. I have my friends so that they are there for me when I arise from the underworld and sink myself back into reality. My friends know that when I come back into the limelight, not to mention anything. The relationship is over and I have buried it in the ground, only to be mentioned when I bring it up.
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So that’s where I start to become a bad friend. The way that I handle break ups, is totally different from how “normal” girls handle break ups. And because I am obviously, not normal, I have a hard time understanding normal and being something that I am not. I mean break ups are tough. I have seen and experienced loosing friends over advice given during break ups and I have realized the trust issues that form between girls after break ups. I have also seen people come together during breakups. So it’s messed up and I think it’s just who I am and who I will always be when handling break ups, but it does make me try to be more compassionate and understanding, because I would like to think I would want the same? Maybe not. Don’t say I didn’t warn ya xo

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2014 was a crazy year. I reviewed that stupid photo collage on Facebook and mine did not even to begin to compare to the “behind the scene” moments that went on AKA good luck finding mine, it doesn’t exist. I am a very private person. When I begin talking to guy and hanging out with […]

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When I moved to Florida, I became a huge Tampa Bay Buccaneers fan after I attended my first game. It was hard not to be a fan with the stadium being 10 minutes from my house.  Sundays during football season, well actually any season, were nuts in Tampa Bay. After that I purchased season tickets […]

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I always battle with the phrase, “I’m sorry.” I battled saying it and then I also battled believing people when they said it. In my past relationships when my ex would say, “I’m sorry” he would expect the fight to just end right ther. Finished. Never brought up again. But because of my age (I […]

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